i take back my words that previous episode was the last one. after some thinking, i thought i should give a closure to this series. so that the story will end here(read:tutup cerita) well eventually, things turn to be exactly as what i had expected.
it was the last day at the place. i was having so may question running on my mind. especially the question "will things be the same as now?" i did asked mr.h and he told me that sometimes maybe we could meet up. well..maybe?
so, the new week without mr.h had started. frankly speaking, i was having this sleepless nite and loss of appetite which i was considering maybe i really like him. i was totally clueless on how to resolve this, feels like something holding me not to proceed for anything. so, the next best thing to do was to perform istiqarah (my 1st istiqarah) asking for guidance from Allah.
alhamdulillah, it seems like a guide from Allah, that i coincidentally found out the shocking truth about him. He's actually is a married guy! now that really hurts me. i was so shocked that i straight away sent a sms to him to confirm on this and told him that i just want to end everything coz i cant afford to be hurt anymore. plus, the last thing that i wanted to get involved in is with a married man! Apparently, it would be a total lie that i didnt cry at all. Eventually, i cried the all night till i fall asleep.
Today, when i woke up, the pain was still there, but i know that i will never cry about this again. Still, i cant afford to put on sincere smile. At least, this thing had been resolved, and sooner or later this pain will subside as time indeed is the best healer. Though i wondered why did we met on my birthday, maybe indeed it was just another coincidence. Or maybe Allah wanted to teach me another lesson on relationship. Wallahualam.
The End :)