Featured song of the week

My TOP 10 - must listen to.. :)

Lemar - Tick Tock

I gotta leave again
I don't wanna go
Things can be so lonely on the road
Could be the presidential suite
But nothing's ever like your bed at home
Especially when you're away from the one you love
It gets tough

Even though it hurts when I'm off at work
Looking at her picture soothes my pain
And for a moment I, find myself right back at home again
I remember, through the ups and downs of my day
I can say, my baby will be

[Chorus]
Sitting, waiting, longing, holding on for me
While the time goes tick tock tick tock
My baby will be
Sitting, waiting, longing, holding on for me
While the time goes tick tock tick tock

She's gotta leave again
She don't wanna go
Hates to be away from me so long
She calls me everyday but
She can't kiss her baby on the phone
When we're hanging up
The tears start rolling down
But somehow oh

Even though she cries
She can find her smile
Cos she knows with me her heart is safe
Funny how time away, makes a loving heart grow fond again
She remembers, through the ups and downs of her day
She can say, oh that I'll be...

Sitting, waiting, longing, holding on for her
While the time goes tick tock tick tock
Her baby will be
Sitting, waiting, longing, holding on for her
While the time goes tick tock tick tock

Oh, we remember, through the ups and downs of our days
We can say, oh that we'll be

[Chorus x2]
Sitting, waiting, longing, holding on for love
While the time goes tick tock tick tock
Oh we will be
Sitting, waiting, longing, holding on for love
While the time goes tick tock tick tock

Lyrics credit to http://www.azlyrics.com

tahniah

tahniah kepada cik mawar..jd pembaca ke 10,000 . .hadiah nye.. maybe a tray of kek batik?

fakta menarik

asik upload pasal kehidupan yg agak membosankan je..kite tambahlaa skit ilmu..

1. The colder the rooms you sleep in, the better the chances are that you'll have a bad dream.

2. You can't kill yourself by holding your breath.

3. 50,000 of the cells in your body will die and be replaced with new cells, all while you have been reading this sentence!

4. People say "Bless you" when you sneeze because when you sneeze, your heart stops for a millisecond. (erk..shud be alhamdulillah laa for the muslim)
5. After spending hours working at a computer display, look at a blank piece of white paper. It will probably appear pink.

6. Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour. (haa? dont do this at home! )

7. GADFY, written by Earnest Wright in 1939 is a 50,000+ word book, which doesn't contain a single word with ' e' in it.

8. After eating too much, your hearing is less sharp.

9. According to German researchers, the risk of heart attack is higher on Monday than any other day of the week.

10.  What do bullet proof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers and laser printers all have in common?

Answer - All invented by women. (ha ha ha ha)

Credit to http://interesting-amazing-facts.blogspot.com

 

randomn rants #3

1. body clock dah lari. usually, aku tido kul 9 or 9.30 mlm (sbb nak kena bangun 5.30 pg). tp eversince aku constantly stay up smp kul 2-3 pagi sbb nak siapkan keja, dah jadi tunggang langgang dah sume. jadinya siang td kat ofis klien, aku asik nguap je! weekend nie aku kena betulkan balik waktu tido aku..

2. esok ade stock take. aku ske sbb boleh pakai jeans dan ade kemungkinan utk balik awal. so boleh tido awal lagi.

3. manager bg instruction utk observe co. operation system. so for that, aku kena g tpt client pada pukul 3 pagi pada 1/1/2010 sbb waktu tu baru diorg tutup. agak2 nye aku audit co apelaa ek sampai kena dtg kul 3 pagi? perancangan awal balik tido n junior dtg amik. tp aku cam terngiang2 keseronokan dan keenakkan tido dlm panggung wayang (with the exception of the cute noise sound yg aku tak sengaja buat tu). masalahnye tadek geng yg rela plak.

4. 2 januari nie ade training la plak. aku rase malas nak join, sbb lepas tu sah2 kena kemas file2. dr aku kemas file baik aku balik tido puas2.

5. sebenarnya aku dah malas nak merancang2 gath la, majlis la. tp aku mmg ade bakat organizer kot. walau camnepun aku ngelat, mesti akhirnye aku gak yg tolong handle. paling terbaru, bbq bday party with family n fren. sesungguhnya aku sgt malas dan penat nak berpk. what's the best way to convey the msg?

6. aku tak dpt apply cuti on my bday. cuti audit dept dah dibekukan smp bulan 6 (tp el dan mc tak dibekukan la). so, hari jadi aku akan berlalu dgn dgr ceramah pasal medical insurance.  pegi tpt client. balik dan tido. menarik. 1st time (eversince aku mengenali menyambut bday) akan aku abiskan tanpa berpoya2.

7. favourite pastime aku skang adelah TIDO~

p/s: aku tak tiru sape2..tetibe je aku malas nak tulis esei sepanjang lebih drpd 2000 patah perkataan.

bbq dlm gelap

another family activities.. mum recently bought this bbq set..so mlm tu though tetibe black out, kitorg layan je makan dalam gelap..

me n princess n the frog . .

it was an unplanned plan. it was on the christmas eve. it was the day after the night where i only slept for 3 and 1/2 hours. it all started when me n sue were chatting thru ym. we suddenly made an impromptu plan to watch a movie@pavi. so the plan was that to get the ticket of alvin n chipmunks. eat our dinner. watch the movie n go home. sumhow, things took a big turn. when the tickets for most of the movies(for the show around 9++) had been sold out. that's when sue suggested to watch the 12.55 am show, which i said ok. it was almost 8 pm.

so, next we joined the crowd excitingly waiting for the snow(it's a snow foam). there were too many ppl, i even envisioned that a stampede could happened with that large of crowd unintentionally pushing each other to get a closer look to the snow when it started to fall. after we managed to safely escape the crowd, we had our dinner and did some window shopping. by 10 pm, we were clueless on what to do and where to lepak as most of the restaurants n cafe were packed with patrons.

so we went for sightseeing in the car. from kl to bangsar. we stopped at baskin robin take away the ice cream(couldnt' forget the look of the ppl there when i who are still in baju kurung came in n started to try almost all the flavours over there)and indulged it thru out the trip. at 12.55 am, we were at the cinema watching the princess and the frog. i was already worn out. this was my 2nd time in the year staying up and out till late in the morning. so expectedly, i fall asleep middle of the movies and eventually sue pinched me when i eventually started to make some cute noise aka snoring (hahahaha..this was soo hilarious and kinda embarrassing). guess that i was damn freaking tired on that day!

randomn rants #2

Kalau menyampah tgk org asik update status, bolehlaa dihidekan sementara. Tp kalo sakit hati bile org layan kite acuh tak acuh? kalo delete nnt hati merindu, nak add balik, die pun jd pening, kite jd malu. Tp kalo dibiarkan rase hari2 nak update status indirectly bgtau die. inilah namenye permasalahan hati. walau pun dah tahu org tak ske. hati ttp nak gak. susah gak kan?

fasa2 kehidupan seorang auditor

Bile jadi junior, asyik dikerah buat vouching + casting + filing + fotostat, buat jelah sume benda, bile kena marah tunduk lantai, senyum aje memanjang, tp seronok, abis fieldwork, dah abis tanggungjawab.

Bile naik semi senior , asyik dikerah audit klien sorang2, masih kena buat vouching dan filing sendri, tp seronok kalo biasanye keja dgn junior, takyah nak buat vouching berhari2, casting sepanjang hari, kalo lebih nasib baik keja dgn senior, takyah pening2 pale kalo klien sengal .

Bile naik senior, asyik dikerah utk lead team yg ade mcm2 perangai, kena menebalkan muka menggesa klien bg pelbagai outstanding item, kalo team buat kerja macam haram dan tak dgr cakap, sendri la kena betulkan, selalu jd first person yg dimarah kaw2 oleh manager, tp seronok sbb boleh arah je team buat nie buat tu.

Bile naik manager, asyik kena urus itu urus ini, pegi meeting sana pegi meeting situ, tepon klien mintak maaf walaupun bukan salah auditor, tepon klien mintak extend dateline bila team audit tak dpt meet dateline, kekadang kena jerit dgn partner gak.tp seronok sbb hanya review keja senior (iaitu hasilan review senior) , cek draft dan tambah mcm2 benda ngarut, kadang2 boleh pilih staff sendri.

Bile jadi partner, pening pale nak cari klien baru, kekadang pening pk hal duit, tp seronok sbb nak masuk bile2 pun boleh, biasa masuk ofis pun , review file dan signed report, paling best $$$$$$

So..korang nak phase yg mane? life ain't easy, bile rase dah senang, nak lg senang. .

planner 2010

aku dah malas nak buat resolusi. ape yg penting. aku kena pastikan hari2 aku lebih baik dr hari yg sebelumnya. memandangkan keadaan sekeliling aku dah byk berubah, aku rasa aku perlukan sesuatu yang boleh buat aku leka dan kurang berpikir ttg benda yg susah nak diduga bile dtgnye. kesimpulannya, aku kena sibukkan diri dgn mcm aktiviti, supaya aku tadek masa nak pk benda2 nie sume.

Jan to Feb - Interim dan final audit
Feb to April - Driving class
Mar to May  - ACCA classes
April - Attend a baking class
May - Eza's Wedding, Holiday @ Langkawi / KK
Jun - ACCA Exam
Jun to Aug - Piano Lesson / Dancing Class
Aug to Nov - ACCA classes
Nov - Holiday @ Singapore
Dec - ACCA Exam, Audit Planning

boleh merancang saja. so far nampak ok. just kena kurangkan aktiviti retail theraphy. sbb sume nie pakai duit.

lagu sweet utk korang . .

Lenka - We Will Not Grow Old

You and me will be lying side by side
Forever, forever
Underneath this adolescent sky
Together, together
And you will hold my heart inside your hand
And you'll be the one to tell me

Oh we've got a long, long way to go
To get there
We'll get there
But oh, if there's one thing that we know
It's that we will not grow old

You made me swear that our hearts will never die
No never, no never
'Cause no one seems to believe that we can fly
Forget them, forget them
Oh..you told me

Oh we've got a long, long way to go
To get there
We'll get there
But oh, if there's one thing that we know
It's that we will not grow old (x2)

Oh how could we know that day, it came with age
That oh, the feeling would fade...

Oh we've got a long, long way to go
To get there
We'll get there
But oh, if there's one thing that we know
It's that we will not grow old (x2)

We will not grow old...

pagi2 dah migrain

tak pernah aku rase secuak ni. tp nasib baik aku dah byk kali melalui pelbagai interogasi, aku berjaya menenangkan diri aku.

citernye bermula bile sorang junior mintak management account dr aku. katenye org atas nk tgk. mase tu aku dah rase tak sedap. tp aku abaikan je sbb aku tgh busy buat audit planning utk co. lain. sejam pastu, aku dpt panggilan telepon utk jumpe org atas. aiseh. serius aku cuak. sbb working paper tak abis review dan kemas n belum upload dlm server. "takpe2, jgn tunjuk muke takut. budget cool je"

masuk je dlm bilik tu, interrogation pun bermula. aku yg tak migrain jd migrain sbb terpaksa memerah otak utk memberi jawapan kat beraneka killer question yg dilemparkan. sumenye berpunca sbb aku tak abis review file, jadi aku pun jadi kurang tahu kat beberapa bahagian yg menjadi kemusykilan org atas. tp sbb name pun senior, kenala 'act' mcm sorang senior. aku jawab sajelaa berdasarkan logik dan rational aku. dekat sejam lebih, org atas aku pun bg conclusion, "saye tanya2 nie sume sbb nak tahu ape kelemahan sistem diorg" dan seterusnye menerangkan ape kelemahan2 atau risk area yg aku patut fokus dan tips2 utk memujuk dan mem'pressure' klien utk bagi information yg kite nak.

aku kuar je bilik tu. terus aku rase kembali bernafas.darah kembali mengalir. tp migrain aku plak yg menggila tetibe.

p/s: still adapting . .

3d 2n - free and easy . .

weekend lepas aku abiskan dgn memerap diumah. bosan dan agak lemas aku dibuatnye. sbb aku tgh mood nak bersosial. just tadek geng plak. nak wat camne. sorang dah kawen. sorang dah ber bf. sorang dah kemana2. sorang ade family dtg. pendek kata, tetibe tadek org nak diajak pegi bersosial. cthnye hari jumaat, plan awal nak kuar cari perfume dan karok, tp family member turun kl, so kena skip laa (papehal pun..family first) jdnye dr pagi ke petang aku ngadap internet. tp berhenti kejap bile Kasih dtg. adik aku +suami +Kasih dtg tido malam tu. hilang jap kebosanan aku, bile tgk si kecik dah pandai senyum dan buat bunyi2an.

pagi sabtu lagi meriah. tak penah2 aku bekfast mcm2 spt pagi tu. adik bongsu aku beli nasi lemak. mak buat lempeng kelapa cicah sardin. aku buat pancake. meriah tak ingat. bile petang diorg dah balik, maka umah dah kembali senyap. masa nie mmg tak ingat punye kebosanan aku. walhal byk je benda nak buat kat umah tu. last2 aku tertido mase tgh layan cite korea online.

hari ahad, dah tadek sape sudi memasak. aku ajak mak g makan kat kopitiam jek. dah tadek geng nak ajak melepak, mak pun ok ape.sementara masih ade masa datelaa puas2 dgn mak. pas makan, kitorg g kedai cd, pilih punya pilih, mak aku borong 5 cite. inkheart , nancy drew, hajime kindaichi, 2 japanese series. aku beli gucci envy me. balik tu sah2laa kitorg melayan movie smp kul 8 mlm. dan2 laa malam tu gak aku busy buat mcm2 benda yg patutnye dah setel kalo aku tak melayan kebosanan aku pada pagi jumaat dan malam sabtu.

minggu yg tak produktif. tp minggu nie aku dpt bygkan betapa pack nye jadual aku. seriously aku tatau samada aku leh buat sume benda yg diplan dlm minggu nie gak.

p/s: idup cam roda. last2 week aku gelakkan org. last week aku gelakkan diri sendri.

mari senamrobik

this group is based at Korea..tp sbb nak tembus pasaran international, kenalaa tukar bahasa..frankly speaking, aku prefer korean language lagi..sbb meaning die jadi lain bile tukar in english..nevertheless..wonder girls is gonna rock the us music industry~ kalo korang ske genre lagu camnie..then i'll recommend wonder girls..the songs are catchy n mmg best..





Lyrics:
1. English version - http://www.metrolyrics.com/nobody-lyrics-wonder-girls.html

2. Korean version:

You Know I still Love You Baby.
And it will never change.

I want nobody nobody But You, I want nobody nobody But You
Nandareun sarameun silheo nigaanimyeon silheo
I want nobody nobody nobody nobody

Nan silheunde wae nar mir eonaeryeogohani jakku naemareun deutji anhgo
Wae ireohge dareun namjaege narbonaeryeo hani eotteohge ireoni

Nar wihae geureoh dan geumar
Neonbujok hadaneun geumar
Ijen geuman haeneon nareur aljanha wae won hajido anhneun georgang yohae

I want nobody nobody But You I want nobody nobody But You
Nandareun sarameun silheo niga animyeon silheo
I want nobody nobody nobody nobody

I want nobody nobody But You I want nobody nobody But You
Nandareun sarameun silheo niga animyeon silheo
I want nobody nobody nobody nobody

Nan joheun de nan haengbok hande neoman isseu myeondwae deo baral geeopt neunde
Nugur mannaseo haengbok haran geoya nan neor tteonaseo haengbok harsueopseo

Nar wihae geureoh dan geumar
Neonbujok hadaneun geumar
Mari andoeneun mari ran georwae molla niga eopsi eotteohge haengbokhae

I want nobody nobody But You I want nobody nobody But You
Nandareun sarameun silheo niga animyeon silh eo
I want nobody nobody nobody nobody

I want nobody nobody But You I want nobody nobody But You

Nandareun sarameun silheo niga animyeon silheo
I want nobody nobody nobody nobody

I don't want nobody body body.I don't want nobody body
Naneun jeongmar niga animyeon niga animyeon silhdan maryaa~

I want nobody nobody But You I want nobody nobody But You
Nandareun sarameun silheo niga animyeon silheo
I want nobody nobody nobody nobody

I want nobody nobody But You I want nobody nobody But You
Nandareun sarameun silheo niga animyeon silheo
I want nobody nobody nobody nobody

RAP)
Back to the days when we were so young and wild and free
Modeunge neomuna kkumman gatatdeon geuttaero doragago sipeunde
Waejakku nareur mireo naeryeohae

Why do you push me away. I don't want nobody nobody

Nobody nobody but you.

10 , 0 0 0

setelah sekian lamenye aku berblogging..hari nie baru nak naik 10,000 hits . . aku tadeklaa kisah sgt pun ade org bace atau tak..sbb aku tak bape reti mengadu dumba kat family..lebih selesa dgn kawan2 atau melalui blog..tp not bad laa..dpt gak smp 10k..papehal pun . .kepada yg bertuah 9,999 , 10,000 dan 10,001 .. insya allah..aku belanje makan..tp korang bayar sendri k! :p

my birthday wishlist

17 more days to go. .eventually..I'm not that excited to celebrate this coming 20th bday.. ;p nevertheless..i'm grateful that i'm still here..alive n healthy.. it just that..my life is currently going thru too much significant drastic changes that i'm still trying to cope (in other words: going thru a depression state) eventually i'm  not planning to celebrate my bday this round (so gals..dont expect any email for a gathering invitation) instead, i'm planning to apply for leave on that day and pamper myself at the salon and some mani-pedi treatment, indulge in BR or HD and retail theraphy..

btw..my birthday wishlist :
- celebrate with mr.X (hmmm)
- a document bag/laptop bag
- psp
- a new camera
- a pair of mary jane by primavera

sah . .

ape yg aku risaukan..akhirnye jadi kenyataan pagi tadi..bile aku mule terdengar manager audit diskus dgn manager corporate recovery dan partner..aku nie bukanlaa terer sgt weh! perlu ke sampai nak berebut2 nak amik aku (ayat takleh blah) ..

akhirnya..aku kena tolong buat audit jap(takleh nak define sekejap nie..mungkin memakan masa 3-4 bulan)..provided bile partner panggil buat special job..kena terus g..bila ditanye aku nak buat yg mane..aku mmg mati akal..last2 aku kate.."tak kisahlaa mana2..cuma jgn jadi saya nie keja kat 2 dept skaligus..saye tanak berkejar2 buat 2 keja yg tak relate langsung pada masa yg sama.."

seharian mengabiskan masa di dept audit..buat aku stress..aku stress mengenangkan peak period yg akan dtg..arrggghhhhhh...ya ALLAH..permudahkanlah urusan hamba-Mu ini..amin

Featured song of the week

eversince i've watched the movie, Definitely, Maybe, i've been looking for this song..fyi rachel weisz sang this song in the movie..sexy yet subtle..



Stacey Kent - I've Got A Crush On You . .

I've got a crush on you, sweetie pie
All the day and night-time
Hear me sigh
I never had the least notion
That I could fall with so much emotion

Could you coo?
Could you care
For a cunning cottage we could share?
The world will pardon my mush
'cause I've got a crush, my baby, on you

(instrumental)

How glad the many millions of Timothys and Williams
Would be to capture me
But you had such persistence,
You wore down my resistance
I fell, and it was swell

You're my big and brave and handsome romeo
How I won you, I shall never, never know

It's not that you're attractive
But, oh, my heart grew active
When you came into view

I've got a crush on you, sweetie pie
All the day and night-time
Hear me sigh
I never had the least notion
That I could fall with so much emotion

Could you coo?
Could you care
For a cunning cottage we could share?
The world will pardon my mush
'cause I've got a crush, my baby, on you

Yes I've got a crush, my baby, on you

who's first ?

frankly speaking, us, the girls do talk about other things apart from love and relationship during lunch. however, all discussion was relating to client, other high profile and p&c info which is knowingly inappropriate to be exposed and discussed here.

eventually, we were having the discussion re: who should declare their feeling first. the guy or the girls. conservatively it had always been the guys who makes the declaration. Though it should continue to be that way, there were times when girl can declare hers too. provided that you're daring enough to make the confession and to bear all the aftermath the daring confession.

nway, when the right time to make declaration? 1.when you think you're ready. 2. when you think you love each other. 3.when you want to give the relationship a name. 4.when u're clueless with the status. 5. when you dont care whether he/she loves you, but you just want to let the other one to know your feeling. 6.when u realize that the other one is too slow..

i've seen quite a lot of cases whereby ppl too afraid to confess their feelings, and at the end, they knew about it when it is all too late already! that is when what left to be said was "dah tadek jodoh, nak buat camne" . .is it really works that way?

nevertheless, clueless on how to make a confession? can be easily done through; email / sms / letter..or can be loudly done by an advertisment in newspaper or at the billboard..or the hardest but the sweetest way..is always by saying it directly from your heart in front of the loved ones..

then..what to do..if somebody made a confession to you? 1. if you like him/her too..just make ur confession too. 2. if you're unsure of your feelings, let them know. 3. if you're with somebody, tell that too..basically, u need to be frank with ur feelings too..

either way, it always preferable for guy to make the step first..but it is not wrong if the girl decided to make the step first..esp in the case if the guy too shy to make the step..hahaha..gile chicken..~

naTea's First PAC

Aku tido kul 2 pagi dan bangun kul 6 pagi (selepas mengemas dan membaca). make up dan stylekan tudung, aku pun gerak dr umah. Owh, aku bukan keja pada hari sabtu. Aku ade PAC atau Performance Assessment Centre utk tapisan PTD. Aku ditempatkan di INTENGAH, Jln Ilmu berdekatan dgn Hospital Universiti Malaysia.

Sbb aku tak drive, aku kenalaa kuar umah kul 6.30pg. Tp biasalah, cari nie cari tu, aku kuar kul 6.50..cuak gak, sbb berkumpul pukul 8. Nasib baik dpt teksi yg menghantar aku LRT Masjid Jamek. Dr situ, aku menuju ke LRT Asia Jaya. By 7.30, aku smp di Asia Jaya. Panik kejap, sbb tak nampak teksi. Rupenye teksi kat tepi jalan besar. By 7.40 aku selamat sampai di INTENGAH dengan jayanya!

Lebih kurang pukul 8, proses pendaftaran bermula. Serah form, amik Tag No (semasa PAC, kami dikenali melalui sistem no, jdnye kena pakai tag kemana2 saja), timbang tinggi dan berat dan serah salinan sijil dan transkrip. Kemudian amik gambar berlima2.(teknik terbaik dan tercepat utk buat gamba passport?) .

9 pagi kami diberi taklimat. 1st berkaitan pelan INTENGAH dan lokasi bangunan2. 2nd, kami diberi taklimat dan penerangan ringkas mengenai PTD dan sistem jawatan kontrak. Aku cume mampu ternganga tgk tangga gaji PTD. Dan kami juga diingatkan kalo jd PTD, kami akan ada byk umah iaitu; umah sendri, pejabat, kereta dan air port.(sape kate keja PTD goyang kaki, dpt gaji besar!) Selepas taklimat ringkas tu, aku dpt rasakan cabaran PAC nie tak sehebat cabaran apabila diterime jd PTD nanti, dan buat aku lg excited nak jd PTD.

Kami dibahagi kepada kumpulan kecil yg terdiri drp 10-11 org. Setiap aktiviti, kami akan bertukar kumpulan dan fasi, mungkin utk mengelakkan keserasian dan biased.

aktiviti pertama - role playing in english.alkisahnya kapal cruise yg dinaiki kami hampir nak tenggelam, utk merepair kerosakkan, ade satu kedai yg jauh gile dr kapal tu. dan lifeboat hanya mampu menampung 360kg, dan perjalanan mengambil masa 5 hari. kami diarahkan berbincang, who should go. Role yg ade; sea captain, seaman, swimming instructor, doctor, mother with a child, engineer,ustaz, the cabinet minister, retired civil servant, milionaire and ex-comando. guess what, aku jd ustaz. mmg hilarious laa nak defend diri sendri. aku cakaplaa, aku tak reti berenang, pastu akan pandai motivate org dan macam2 lagilah. akhirnya kami bawak org2 yg tak dislash namenye.

aktiviti kedua - bahas dalam bahasa melayu. tajuk 'wanita cantik kurang cerdik, lelaki gagah kurang bijak'. kontroversi kan tajuk? sbb tajuk agak jeneral, menyebabkan byk hujah pihak pencadang dan pembangkan cam ilang arah. aku pun agak ilang gakla.lg plak sakit perut dan pale pening.

kami lunch di dewan makan yg cantik. kemudian tukar baju sukan dan rehat di common room.

ujian sahsiah dan minat - soklan objektif 200 utk sahsiah dan 227 utk minat. seriously, aku sakit tengkuk pas tu. sbb kena siapkan dlm sejam. sahsiah utk tgk perangai dan cara permikiran.

aktiviti ketiga- dimulakan dgn acara teambuilding. berbekalkan paper, gunting, selotip dan tali, kami dikehendaki buat tiang penahan kilat setinggi 10 kaki dlm masa 30 minit. mencabar nie. walaupun tak naik pun tiangnye, tp teamwork mmg best. pastu, senam robik, kami dikehendaki mengkareograf sendri senamrobik kami berdasarkan 3 lagu; bole chudiya, lagu sudirman dan hey single ladies. fun dan bising laa waktu nie. tp though cam tak bape teratur, but we make it! aktiviti yg paling digeruni, aktiviti lasak, rupenye kali nie kena lari 1.2km, abis lari akan diberi kad berwarna. aku mestilaa cemerlang, sbb dah lame tak lari on treadmill. baru lari halfway naik bukit yg tinggi, dah sakit kat abdomen.aku jalan dan lari skit2, yg penting abis dan bukan jadi org 10 terakhir.

lega betul rasanye, bile lepas lari dah tadek apa2..dah bole balik! camne aku balik ek tadi? owh, aku ngan kawan2 baru, kuar dr INTENGAH, lintas jalan dan berjalan kearah kanan dan belok kiri, ade bus stand! dan tggu 5 minit before dpt cab ke Universiti, penatnyeee..tuhan saja yg tau! aku tido dlm bas sampai hampir nak terlepas bus stand.

snowy KL

setelah beberapa hari dilanda mimpi yg pelik2 kembali, akhirnye semalam aku rase lega dan puas tido..sbb mimpi dah tukar version lain..korang nak tahu version ape? aku mimpi KL dilanda dan diselimuti salji..huhuhu..

mmg real laa..siap aku dpt pegang salji tu..miahahhahah.. mungkin petanda yg aku bakal pegi ke tempat yg bersalji.. hahaha (cepat2 laa air asia dpt lesen nak g seoul!)

Image info:
Larisa, Greece - City with snow in winter from Wikimedia

padah ignorance..

dari pagi tadi, aku dah ade satu perasaan pelik nie, lebih kurang macam instinct laa. tp aku abaikan saje. pastu waktu lunch masa aku pegang purse, instinct tu dtg lagi, mcm bg peringatan plak. still aku abaikan. pastu petang, lebih kurang sejam sebelum aku balik, makin kuat plak instinct tu, kali nie aku buat tindakan, aku simpan purse aku dlm bag yg ade paperwork. dan bile aku balik td, instinct yg aku rasa aku akan tinggal purse jadi kenyataan. aku tertinggal purse yg didlm bag paperwork yg ditinggalkan dkt client. aku tak dapat nak kate "benda dah nak jadi"..sbb sebenarnye sifat ignorance aku yg menyebabkan aku tertinggal purse(dan jam guess baru) kat ofis client aku. sekarang aku tawakal jelaa. semoga staff kat sane adelah org yg amanah dan jujur.amin.

dan nak dijadikan cerita, dlm handbag merah aku yg besar tu, hanye ade RM2.50. aku tarik nafas dan terus pk ape cara terbaik dan termurah utk smp umah. so, 1st thing aku buat, tanye mak aku kat mane. seb baik ade kat umah. jd aku naik lrt dr sentul timur ke sogo berbekalkan rm1.40. dan plan seterusnye adelah menunggu SJ bus (sbb bas tu je tiketnye rm1), alhamdulillah, aku takyah tggu pun, bas sdg menanti, ade tpt kosong plak tu. aku turun di bus stop yg lebih kurang 3 km dr umah aku dan naik cab yg dibayar mak aku.

nampaknye malam nie aku kena korek tabung syiling darurat aku! esok mesti sume org happy je tgk aku bagi duit cukup2 je.. ;p

randomn rants

There are so many things running on my mind right now. Most are soon to be problems to me. First with the PTD assessment just around the corner, I barely made any preparation at all. Haven’t filled the forms, photocopy the cert (by the way, till today I still haven’t received the copy of the cert that I applied last two weeks!!), print new passport photos and homework on the ministries in govt. frankly, I am freaking nervous about going for the assessment, which I can’t explain why (hint: the possibilities of having an impromptu public speaking session)

Current audit assignment is making me stress! The downturn is, when I stress, I’ll eat more (unless if I got extra money right now, I would channeled my stress through retail therapy, but too bad, I’m quite broke right now!) As the client is unfamiliar with the interim  audit procedure, we had to wait for sometime before getting the answers for our queries and also the documents. And at the same time I wish I could be much firmer with the juniors esp, the guys! I just could not find the right way to coerce them to observe the audit schedule . Scolding them should be my last resort. For now, I am still able to control my temper. Thus, I had come up with this approaches so that I can effectively handle the team:

1. Ask them to submit their assigned sections to me at every two days, so that I can track their progress and at the same time I can review and comment on their working papers.
2. Instruct them to stay at the client’s place a bit longer than usual.
3.Indirectly reminded them to perform as I'll be appraising them later.

Let’s hope that I would not end up screaming at my team like any other audit senior tends to do.

Featured song of the week

Estrella - Ternyata

Estrella-Ternyata....

Aku lihat dia pandangan pertama
Ternyata indah
Senyuman, Liriknya

Ku ingin dia, saat pertama
Berjumpa, dengannya
Membuat aku gelisah

c/o
Waktu berlalu hari demi hari
Hati ku dambakannya
Untuk bercinta lagi

Ku ingin dia, saat pertama
Berjumpa, dengannya
Membuat aku gelisah

repeat c/o

p/s: sweet ...sweet n sweet . . .

masam manis 2009

dah kurang sebulan before masuk 2010..so, ape lagi..skang time nak buat summary of 2009..rasenye dah tadek big event yg aku tatau lg..

januari

yg sweet - bday celebration at the italiannies..menang guess bag worth rm500..

yang pahit - kena ragut. hp rm1800 pun kena kebas..

yg menarik - akhirnye aku join fitness first..

february

yg sweet - menang CIMB cash rebate..i'd passed my exam!

march

yg sweet -  my sis and her husband is expecting their first child

april

yg sweet - attend byk gile wedding (yuni's, kimi's n adam's)

may

bulan yg biasa..nothing much happened

june

yg sweet - luncheon session with #qepohians ..jjcm with my bffs..me n bffs join jacob's walk of life

yg tak bape best - the most stressful months..sbb dateline for submission to CCM

yg tak dpt dikenal pasti - i decided to return the ring ..

july

yg sweet - g kenduri fidah n kumpul ramai2(my dorm-mate for 4 years, classmate for 2 years, roomate for 3 years)

yg tak best - the worst diarrhea ever in my life!..

august

yg sweet - i finally tendered in my resignation..i passed my ACCA paper! yeay..6 more to go

yg excited - attended the PTD exam..(penat pun ade gak)

yg best - jln2 dimelaka with kimi+izma, rina+azhar+fatin..

yg pahit - hari2 ofis mcm dilanda ribut taufan..sgt2 stress..

september

yg sgt sweet - my sis gave birth on 090909..

yg sweet - join gathering with ex-smstarian..n officially jobless..duk umah rehat2..

oktober

yg sgt sweet - ella gave birth to hana..bertambahlaa geng2 jjcm pas nie..

yg sweet - mira n man..akhirnye kawin jua..n i'd passed the PTD exam..

yg best - jln2 ke penang dgn rina dan family

november 

yg sgt sweet - sarah gave birth to safa..

yg excited -mule keja di tpt baru

december 

yg sweet - my kazen dah bertunang dgn her 10 years bf..jamie is getting married too..

2009 mmg tahun yg menarik..more good things happened compared to bad things..:) aku bersyukur..dan pada masa yg same berterime kasih pada org sekeliling aku yg buat tahun nie best! ..hopefully next year much2 better than this year..

layan tagging game jap

1. Adakah anda rasa anda hot?
Kekadanglaaa..bile ade org buat keja tak memenuhi kriteria atau org cari pasal..mase tu aku mmg hot..

2. Upload gambar kegemaran anda.
3. Cerita pasal gambar?
mase wedding fidah (best buddy eversince at semesta) with the #qepohian..though tak lengkap korum..but this pic sgt2 ceria..:)


4. Bila kali terakhir makan pizza?
sebulan yg lepas..dkt shangri-la buffet..sedap..siap buat iklan pizza lg..sbb still panas dan byk cheese..

5. Lagu terakhir yang anda dengar?
leona lewis ..better in time .. dlm keta mase on the way balik dr umah kazen

6. Apa yang anda buat selain menyelesaikan tag ini?
blogging. solat. makan mlm.

7. Selain nama sendiri anda dipanggil nama apa?
ya, nad, nadia, namo

8. Tag lagi 6 orang

- mawar
- ella
- sue
- waida
- hafiz
- effi

9. Siapakah orang No.1 pada anda?
one of my bff..tp skang dah tak bape berkepit sgt..sbb die sibuk berkepit ngan bf..

10. Kata sesuatu mengenai orang no 5
satu2nye laki yg penah aku kenal yg berani dan bangga pakai baju pink. plus he's art junkie..

11. No.3 ada hubungan dengan siapa?
aku tau sape..tp tak sesuai nk digembar-gemburkan disini..

12. Bagaimana pula orang no.4?
ade blog yg penuh tips pekomputeran..

13. Pesanan kepada orang no 6.?
aku masih igt peristiwa gambar yg dialter di muzium kuala kangsar!!!

Eh, mana orang no.2? Takpe², meh I tambah sendiri..

14. Apa kelebihan yang anda nampak pada orang no.2 ni?
erm..die baru je dpt baby comel..jeles!!



makanye..silelaa layan tag aku..bm please..

nur kasih akhir . .

aku tak tahu sama ade, berjaya atau tak TV3 mencapai target 5 juta rakyat malaysia tgk episod akhir Nur Kasih pada raya haji haritu. tp yg aku pasti, makcik2 aku dok tepon umah pagi raya sempat cakap yg mlm tu ade nur kasih episod akhir. berdasarkan tu, aku assume diorg dpt mencapai target dan mungkin aku ade sedikit bangga sbb aku adelah antara 5 juta yg menonton episod akhir tu.

keseluruhannye, aku puas hati dgn ending cite nur kasih. tak perlu nak dipanjang2kan saat2 gembira selepas sumenye selesai. sbbnye di pertengahan cite mmg ade byk scene yg mane adam dan nur bahagia tanpe adam ade rase yg die perlu membalas pengorbanan aidil dan perasaan yg meragui kesetiaan cinta nur.

utk org yg miss episod akhir; nie spoiler utk anda..episod dimulakan dgn alya memujuk nur utk jd madu die. sarah plak akhirnye benar2 insaf, tak tahu sama ada ketika die mengekori nur ke kedai ataupun selepas kemalangan dimana die terjatuh atas kaca. kemudian beberapa bulan lepas tu, nur nekad utk pegi memulakan kehidupan baru di tpt lain. pada masa yg same adam berjaya diselamatkan dan pulang ke kg. tp ketika kenduri doa selamat di rumahnye, disangkenye kenduri pernikahan nur dan abgnya. tp bile dlm ketapi, die nmpk nur berseorangan, die menghulurkan salam dan diorg berpelukan.

bace je mmg tak best. kalo nak tgk yg real punye/skali lagi:
1. tv3, selasa-jumaat @ 7.30 mlm..tadek iklan punye..
2. cari di youtube..rasenye berlambak
3. pegi http://www.tv3.com.my dan click catch up tv..tp kena sign up dulu..
4. beli je dvd terus kat Nur Kasih Website

pengganti cite nie..aliff firdaus..pasal isteri berjaya yg ego dgn suami die..lakonan beego, irma,maria farida dan saifulnizam..aku tak bape ske dgn selection pelakon nie..tp bg peluanglaa tgk seround jumaat, 11/12/2009 nie..dgr cite shooting dibuat kat umah linda onn..:0

she's not the one. .

me n my junior were having another random conversation during lunch. today we talked about two subjects; guys who is over romantic(and how to deal with it) and about knowing the right time to settle down(get married)..as i rarely encounter the situation where the guy was too romantic (with the exception of my sis's husband)..i just listened and giggles to her stories. she even asked me how should i dealt with too poetic sms. i told her that once i got such sms. i just read it in a glance, reply with a smiley face/ wink eyes ..and saved the msg(only read and digested the sms when i was totally free). seems that she agreed with my idea.. :p

later on we jumped into another topic, when she started to tell me about her brother. all the while, there's a girl been admiring and really liked her brother, but as much as her brother interested to be with the girl, he refused to pursue. his reason was that there's so many things had to be done; well obviously, it was about the money. However, recently when his friends started to settle down one by one, he decided to make that big step. which is to be in a relationship.

Then, i asked her whether her brother is with the same girl that she told me about which she replied that it is not the same girl. I told her this "it was not about settling down that bothers him. it just that, i think ur brother thought that maybe she's not the one. if she's the one, he would have make the big step earlier and try to make it work for whatever it takes"

She was a bit confused about should she is in that situation, how to know whether she's the one or not. Well, the answer is simple; "you wouldn't know whether you're the one for him or not. but there's no harm, in trying to give an impression to him that u're the one, but bear in mind that changing the way you are for the sake of somebody is not easy, most of the time you'll revert back to old you."(now i sounded like dr.love..wth)

p/s: talk is easy. but doing it?

nervousness

just now, my consulting manager told me that i'll be helping out the audit dept with their interim audit. i was quite surprised when she suddenly broke the news, but it was kinda expected that i'll be temporarily transferred to audit dept as i already had 3 years experience in audit. sumhow, this had made me became so nervous. As this was my 1st time leading a team at a new place(as i am still in dark about the way they perform their audit, their culture and their expectation), furthermore this is our 1st year audit which means that we had no reference at all and the best of all this is a construction company(a construction company always lead to complicated and tedious audit procedure to be carried out).

this thingy had kinda killed my festive mood as i was bit worried whether i'll manage to handle the team and the interim audit well (as i am having a feeling that all the manager has high expectation of me as i had previous experience in one of the big 4) so, i had loaded my raddish with the Firm's audit procedure and various crucial info for the audit planning so that i could read and digest and plan for a hopefully a well executed audit schedule. wish me luck~

sambilan

Skang musim bercuti kat ofis. Ade yg amik cuti kawin, cuti mengabiskan cuti, cuti bawak anak jalan2 dan cuti utk exam. Tp kebanyakkannye cuti exam la, sbb exam ACCA is just around the corner. Aku jelah tak amik cuti. Sbb baru masuk keja dan aku tak amik exam bulan 12 nie.

Keja kat audit firm nie mmg bertuah dan memudahkan. Sbb buat masa skang, tak byk lg kompeni komersial yg sanggup bagi cuti free yg dinamakan study leave dan exam leave utk pekerja yg sambung stadi. Tp kalo di audit firm, 1 paper leh dpt 5 hari study leave dan 1 hari exam leave, Mahal tu! Still, ramai org kate tak cukup cuti banyak tu. Bg aku, mmg cukup cuti byk tu, provided kite bukan gune cuti tu utk berjalan2, berdating, work out kat gym saje, qada tido, marathon cite korea atau stadi saat2 akhir.

Ade beberapa org penah tanye aku, ko cuti utk ape? Aku jawab cuti nak stadi utk exam. Pastu diorg akan buat muke terkejut dan tanye lagi, ko sambung belaja ke, rajinnye ko.Pastu aku akan jawab panjang lebar, aku buat ACCA, nak jadi akauntan, aku buat nie pun under P*et dan blab la. Soklan last skali sblm topic ditutup, ACCA tu ape? ACCA tu sejenis qualification utk jadi akauntan bertauliah, daripada UK. Tak susah pun nak buat ACCA tu, asalkan duit byk, setahun leh amik byk exam dan repeat berkali2 pun. Bunyi mcm sijil yg dibeli je? Tadeklah semudah tu. Sbb examnye susah nak dipas dan ade byk requirement experience yg kena direpot kat diorg.

Org juge ske tanye nape buat part time study? Aku ske jawab, alasan kukuh nak tangguh kawin. Sebenarnye aku nak sentiasa aktifkan otak aku nie. Sbb nak elak2 kan penyakit dementia dan yg seangkatan dgnnye. Dan aku rase thru additional degree n cert nie dpt mempercepatkan proses promotion gak. Kalo ditanye kat org lain, mungkin ade yg akan cakap, sbb nak jumpe kawan baru atau tak tau nak buat ape dgn duit atau bosan asik kena berkepit dgn bf/gf atau bos suruh sambung belaja dan tidak kurang gak yg kate nak tebus kesilapan lalu.

Kalo ditanye susah atau tak buat part time study nie. Jawapan aku mane ade benda yg bagus dtg bergolek camtu je. Lagi2 plak kalo dlm line audit nie. Dah tak terkira bape kali aku tuang kelas (tp aku tak penah tuang revision kelas, penting tu, sbb tu kelas summary 3-4 bulan punye kelas) Sbb aku tuang kelas, kena ot kat tpt client atau sbb dah terlalu penat atau sbb kena rush kuarkan audit report. Last2 aku decide tanak amik kelas utk certain2 paper yg aku boleh stadi sendri. Mostly paper teori la. Jimat masa, duit dan tadeklaa aku rase bersalah setiap kali aku skip kelas. Pastu, mase yg ade utk ulangkaji pun terhad. Balik keja dah malam. Weekend kekadang ade kelas. So bile lagi? Makanye kena buat jadual belaja. Tp aku tak buat. Nnt tambah rase bersalah plak bile aku tak follow.

Part time study tak semestinye benda yg berunsurkan ilmiah semata2. Wpun ramai gak yg sambung MBA, amik degree mgmt program, atau bermacam2 certification. Ade gak yg amik part time kelas memasak, kelas menjahit , kelas piano dan mcm2 kelas laa yg dpt meng’enrich’kan lg kehidupan. Tp part time camnie biasanye tak dapat study leave laa, tp sgt membantu menghilangkan stress.

nur kasih . . .akhirnya abis jua..

Minggu hadapan, pada malam raya haji, episod akhir Nur Kasih. So, jgn ketinggalan k. Frankly speaking, aku sbnrnye tadeklaa se-addicted cam mak aku. takleh nak miss langsung. just towards episode 18 keatas, the series getting emotional dan bile aku tgk, style penyampaian cite die ade ala2 korean series skit. Mungkin sbb skrip, arahan, sinematografi dan lakonan watak2 yg nmpknye menjiwai watak2 diorg.

Impak cite nie mmg byk. Ade yg sanggup siapkan keja secepat mungkin pada hari jumaat  sbb nak balik awal. Ade yg sanggup skip gym. Ade yg hanye mulakan aktiviti malam lepas habis nur kasih. Ramai gak makcik2 berdoa semoga anak2 daranye dpt kawin org cam aidil atau anak terunanye dpt kawin dgn org cam nur amina. Dan aku rase ramai gak yg berangan2 nak kawin dgn org cam nur tu.

p/s: malam tu aku akan tgk nur kasih bersama2 nur kasih ariessa. :)

Scrooge

1st time aku tgk cite 3d. Siap angkut bonda tersayang skali. Kat TGV KLCC, harga tiket utk 3D adalah RM18 seorang. B4 masuk panggung, kami diberi cermin mata khas. (tp kena pulang baliklaa kan). As a 1st timer, seriously aku kagum n cam jakun skit. All seems so real n really close to us. Nway, sape yg tak tahu Christmas Carol, yg ditulis oleh Charles Dickens nie. Pasal si tua yg kedekut dan cengeng, Scrooge yg mase Eve of Chrismast telah dibawa ke 3 tpt oleh 3 spirit yg berbeza2; the past, present and future utk menyedarkan dan mengubah perangai Scrooge yg bencikan krismas. A heartwarming movie with nice construction of 3D. Namun, aku tak berapa dpt menikmati cite nie tadi. 1st mungkin sbb aku terlalu kenyang, so dah mcm mengantuk skit. 2nd sbb tadek english subtitle. 3rd sbb aku dh dpt mengagak jalan cite. 4th sbb cite nie banyak dark scene. 5th sbb ade org2 yg tak reti adab kat tgk wayang; berborak2 dan on hp yg lampunye terang gile.

Sbg konklusi, aku rase tadeklaa berbaloi sgt rm18 tu, tp agak oklaa utk kualiti 3d yg aku dpt nikmati tadi. So, kalo korang nak cube, bolehlaa tgk "Avatar" directed by Steven Spielberg nnt.

independent or dependent ?

If you want to be happy, be independent. If you want to make people unhappy, make them dependent on you, and let them down.

 Seperti biasa waktu lunch adelah waktu berborak2 kosong. Haritu kami berborak pasal transportation, pasal exam ACCA dan pasal lelaki yg cerewet. Alkisahnye, sorang senior nie mmg akan berjalan kaki balik ke umah, sbb hanye 5 minit je dr umah. Dan suatu hari tu, ofismate yg terserempak dgn die, offer laa nak anta balik umah. Dan akak tu cakaplaa tanak(yelaa, sbb dah dekat sgt kan?) Pastu budak tu kate "Akak nie, laki tak ske tau pompuan yg independent sgt"

Hurm, pelik. Setahu aku diorg lagi suke pompuan yg independent. Sbbnye senang nak diurus dan tak perlu nak dijaga sangat. Dan mmg betul ape yg aku cakap, bile ditanye pada seorg kawan yg baru bertunang, ttg pilihan dia tu..die jawab "sbb die independent. tak perlu nak dihantar dan diambil. Sume boleh buat sendri. Senang."

Bagi aku, pompuan mmg patut jd independent. Supaya tak senang diperlekehkan dan supaya tadek rase hilang arah bile2 things went wrong. Dan lelaki pulak, jgn plak take things for granted. Mungkin sometimes ur wife or gf ade perasaan nak dipamper skali skala. So skali skala buatlaa suprise, tggu depan ofis or offer tolong die setelkan sumthing. dan pompuan plak, if u're happened to be with guy who is a dominant kind of person, jgn laa terlalu menunjukkan sikap independent tu, so that diorg tadek rase yg diorg tak diperlukan. Yg jenis dependent tu plak, tp bf/suami jenis sibuk selalu, memule mungkin rase sumenye still best dimate si laki, tp sooner or later kalo tadek effort, maybe akan menimbulkan kerunsingan dan kesusahan plak.

Papehal pun, dalam ape jua keadaan pun, independent tu mmg sgt penting. Wpun susah nak dimulakan. Once, u're on the track, sume jd senang n it will helps u to boost ur confidence too.

p/s: aku tak de lesen kereta lg. skali skala terpaksa dependent g kenduri kendara atau outing atau travel trip dgn kawan2.tp most of the time aku mmg expert dgn public transport nie. so, adekah aku independent dr segi transportation nie?

kelam kabut

hari nie dimulakan dgn pagi yg sgt kelam kabut. Aku tertido dgn contact lens dan spt dijangka, contact lens aku ilang laa pagi2 buta tu. Kebetulan aku dah tadek spare. Nak tanak aku terpakse membongkar katil aku, ketuk2 bantal, ketuk2 cadar, angkat tilam, menyuluh bawah katil. Last2 aku jumpe dicelah2 kayu katil. Aku cuci contact lense aku 3 kali, baru aku pakai. Pastu kelam kabut, solat subuh, iron tudung, cari kotak kasut pink wedges dan kemas katil balik (aku mmg ske dress up lebih2 skit on Friday..;p)

aku tggu bas lebih lame dr biasa. Dekat 20 minit baru ade bas. “konfem aku kena berasak naik lrt harini” .dahlah pakai kasut mahal, kena jln cepat2 plak tu, alamatnye cepatlaa kasut aku rosak. Spt aku jangka, line dah panjang. Aku terpaksa pas 1 trip (seb baik berasak dgn org2 mesia yg keja klcc saje). Smp wangsa maju, bas plak yg lmbt. Smp ofis just nice before 8.30 dan terpakse touch up balik ..hahaha..tulah..lenkali tanggalkan contact lens dulu..:p

mkn mkn

mlm td..sume kat umah aku malas nak masak..kesudahannye aku mkn ayamas goreng..isi ketam goreng dan karipap segera goreng..nie pun lepas dpt kebenaran drpd public trainer..LOL (haha..tiru style die gelak) ..mlm sblm tu aku layan french toast dgn skit peanut butter dan honey..aku dah berjaya mengurangkan ketagihan aku pada nasi! yeay!

terribly confused . .

Last week (and even till today) was a torturous. It had been raining almost everyday (I’m not blaming the rain. But having cloudy weather almost every evening was a bit depressing to me). I was having a reminiscent of me and Mr.X. This was totally out of nowhere. It was not triggered by any of his SMSes or phone calls (in fact I received none since the day I returned the thing. Thus, the fact that I was mentioning this, does this means that I hoped to receive any from him since the beginning?) Maybe I was bit depressed. This depression was due to my attempt to adapt with the new work. And at the same time I was a bit tense when thinking about the PTD Assessment program that I have to attend this coming December. I think this was a habit of me, as I was used to tell him and my fears, my feelings, my concerns. Though most of the time he would say something nice to comforts me, but there were times when he just listening to my grumbles and rants without saying nothing at all as he knew that I just want to borrow his ears. Now that things had taken an unfavorable turn, I was in dark. To who shall I expressed my fears, my feelings now. I just can’t find the answer. I just had the memories.

However, last week was different. I was having the best fight ever. My heart was rebelling. Provoking me to sms him or call him. My pride was totally against the idea of giving in. The pride views my attempt as a sign of desperation. I was clueless. Alhamdulillah, I managed to contain myself from contacting him.

I told my bff about this. She was telling me that, I was still having the symptoms. She even suggested that I should meet him and resolve everything. Eventually, I’m not sure, what are we trying to resolve? Our un-named relationship? Our feelings? We could seat face to face. Talking about what’s in the past. Then? Discussing about the future? The future without “us” or with “us”.

As much as I want to resolve this, I am pretty sure of one thing. One of us will hurt another intentionally. Why would I open up myself for another cut, when I’m still in healing process? I am also very2 certain that though whatever the outcome of this so called meeting, this “L” feelings will keeps on linger for quite some time.

p/s: what a decision to make. I can do this! I must do this.

heart n hurt

utk kali ke 2 aku mengulang amaran aku kat org2 di umah aku. " sape2 lg tanye bile nad nak kawin, nad nak pindah umah". aku serius. dah sgt bosan dan muak! aku baru 26. adik aku dah kawin.tu hal die. dah bercinta hampir 8 tahun. takan nak tggu aku. baru diorg nak kawin?. aku bukan tanak kawin. cume jodoh tak sampai lg. nape nak kecoh sgt?

aku sebenarnya dah penat nak mencari. aku pun dah penat dikecewakan. bile aku pulangkan cincin tu kat mr.x. aku igtkan rase penat aku menunggu die dah abis. tp aku still rase letih smp skang. aku rase letih dan perit bile ntah bile2 aje aku tetibe teringat kat die.

tp ironi nye. aku masih berani mencuba. tp percubaan tu tak kemana pun. sbnrnye aku nak tanye je. what went wrong. memule. everything went well. tetibe keadaan jd senyap. dan hampir tadek ape2. mungkin sbb die dah tahu. dan die sedar. i'm not the one.

now. it hurts so much. there's nothing i can do to heal the pain. i just keep staring thru the window. thru the rain. let time flies. time is the best healer. love. pls stop knocking on my heart.

kali ke 3

keja baru. probation period 3 bulan. annual leave 16 hari. gaji adelaa beberapa. ofis dekat lrt. dekat jj dan carrefour. tp kena naik teksi atau bas la. sykt bumiputera. saja tukar angin. setakat nie. aku suke. takyah pk nak pakai kasut ape. sbb kami tak perlu pakai kasut dipejabat. yelah. buat ape berkasut di atas karpet baru? yg sedap dipijak plak tu?. hari isnin. dimulakan dgn bacaan al-quran dan tafsir beramai2. peluang utk improve bacaan dan perbanyakkan bacaan al-quran. kalo ade mase boleh ke kelas tajwid. kerja di sykt bumiputera mmg lain skit. tatatertib kena jaga lebih skit drp biasa. takleh pakai baju sembarangan.(aku ade baju kerja sembarangan ke). lain2 masih dlm percubaan mengadunkan diri dgn diorg. aku cume rindukan hari jumaat yg aku boleh pakai kasual.

p/s: byk adik2 saje. bosan gak disitu..:P

hujung minggu yg tenang dan santai

mlm jumaat. aku dinner ngan ex-officemate kat shangri-la. boss dpt diskaun 35%. bolehlaa nak belanje kitorg yg ramai nie. aku tak bape makan sgt pun. sbb perut aku dah masuk angin. just layan sushi, sashimi, sepotong pizza, dim sum dan salad. tp pencuci mulut ttp aku tak lupe wpun tgh sakit perut. tiramisu. choc fountain. aiskrim. crepe. tp tu je yg aku lalu nk makan. lain2 diabiskan dgn lawak2 yg tah pape dan amik gamba.

sabtu pagi. pttnye aku pegi gym. tp kalo dah malam sblmnye aku dah membantai byk gak raw food. kite boleh agaklaa ape kesudahannye di keesokan harinye. jadi aku duk umah saje. sampai ptg. adik aku tepon. mintak tolong babysit Kasih. mak aku ske sgt. huhu. takat suke dpt jumpe cucu jelaa. tp aku laa mangsanye.(aku bkn tak suke budak2. just aku clueless bile diorg menangis.tak dpt nak figure out what's wrong). Kasih smp lebey kurang pukul 7.30ptg. comel sgt! dah pandai senyum. sejam lebih die senyap je. tgk tv. tgk org. pastu die dah mula tak keruan. cari mami die punye susu la. haha. kelaka plak. die asik tgk muke aku. pastu die pandang tpt lain. mesti die pk "mcm mami. tp nape tak putih cam mami?" kesudahannye die nangis. aku dodoikan die. baru tido jap. terjaga. sbb dgr hon keta. bg susu botol. die rejek. pastu muke kerut2. oh. membuang upenye. aku laa tukang tukar lampinnye. keadaan berulang utk 2 kali pd mlm tu. smp si maminye dtg amik. penat!

ahad. aku bangun dgn kepala berdenyut di tengah2 dahi. tekak aku sgt perit. aku masak dan mkn lunch (sambal ikan, udang masam manis dan kerabu pucuk paku). dan aku tido smp maghrib. ye. aku demam. sbb asik kena ujan waktu petang. mlm tu baru aku mandi. aku pakse diri mandi air sejuk standard air kolah kat kg. aku pakse telan actifast 3 biji juga. alhamdulillah. aku dah tak demam pagi nie.

aku rase minggu nie pun aku akan ade wiken yg santai. wpun aku rindu kesibukan kuar dgn kawan2. tp kalo selalu dpt lepak kat umah. tak buat pape pun. sgt seronok. what a life~

dilema . .

aku tak tahu. perlukah aku risau benda nie skang? masenye masih lame lg. tp mungkin aku nie byk sgt berpk kot. aku dah nak keja sebulan kat ofis baru nie. aku still adapting. n so far ruang utk aku adapt kat sini ade. tp ptg tadi, surat dah sampai. surat panggilan ke assesment centre. hmm. baru masuk 2nd level. jalan masih jauh. ntah lepas atau tak. persoalannya. kalo aku buat yg terbaik. dan lepas sume level. dan dioffer. sah2 laa kena lapor diri saat2 terakhir. yg paling aku risaukan. kalo tu memerlukan aku resign 24 hours. sbbnye. kalo ikut offer letter. kena serve two month notice. kalo dah kena resign 24 hours. kena bayar balik gaji 2 bulan? kena bayar hampir rm7k? berbaloi ke? aku dah mula rase tersepit. antara mak aku yg nak sgt aku jd ptd. dan antara diri aku sendiri yg dah bosan nak mengadapt dgn dunia yg baru. ya allah. semoga Kau permudahkan hidupku.

hari ini hari rabu

so what kalo hari ini hari rabu? hari nie aku byk gile keja tak siap2. pastu superior aku amik half day sbb anak demam panas. hari nie spt hari yg lain. tp hari nie kalo pada 10 tahun yg lepas mmg special. special sbb harinie kena pakai baju unit beruniform g sekolah. aku mmg ade byk kenangan dgn baju unit beruniform nie. lagi plak budak2 sbp, bile sampai tang unit beruniform, berjela jelaa aktiviti2.

mase aku baru form 1, aku puas pk nak join unit beruniform yg mane. akhirnye aku decide join pandu puteri. kesinambungan utk tunas puteri (mase aku sek rendah). utk form 1 - form 3 tak byk benda menarik sgt. which was good. aku dpt escape dr perbarisan hari sukan yg aku benci sgt2.

naik form 4, automatik aku jd renjer puteri. dan tang2 tu jugaklaa kuar pekeliling utk pakai baju unit beruniform dr pagi. yg nie aku dan rakan2 renjer puteri mmg tak ske!!. tak selesa, pakai baju kemeja n tuck in skirt(nasib baik mase tu aku still kurus lg)..pastu jalan2 keliling sekolah-time recess, time g library /toilet. so aku selalu tak tuck in. sehinggalah pada suatu hari aku bertembung dgn cikgu disiplin. bile die nampak aku tak tuck in baju tu, die panggil aku n cubit perut aku tang2 tu jugak.woh..sakit gile..lebam lame baru baik tu.. pastu aku tuck in sentiasa la..

tak dpt aku lupe..bile dua2 tahun tu kitorg diwajibkan masuk perbarisan hari sukan dan pertandingan kawat..maybe sbb kitorg jenis geng yg ske rebel dgn cikgu2 unit..so kirenye nak mendisiplinkan kitorg laa tu..dlm tgh memberontak tu, kitorg leh menang plak tu..heheh..tp yg paling aku geram, bile aku kena pegang bendera yg berat tu sepanjang perbarisan dan upacara perasmian(niepun kerja cikgu kelab)..mmg menahan diri drp pitam mase tu..

last but not least, yg aku rindui, aktiviti berkhemah kat kawasan sekolah. totally unforgettable. i can proudly said that almost everything kat sekolah tu aku dah panjat dan redah. hahaha . tembok court tenis..pokok2..longkang2..kolam2..tebing2 curam di padang2 kat sekolah.

p/s: another crap. aku tgh cari momentum nak mengabiskan novel aku. woh. lg 15 chapter.

Poem for you

aku tgh menggeledah barang2 lama aku..sbb nk cari koleksi tag2 aktiviti kat utp..tp aku tak jumpe..sebaliknye aku jumpe journal..tadeklaa journal pun..lebih kepada koleksi mcm2 jenis tulisan..short stories..quotes..poems..bile aku bace balik..ade yg aku gelak2..ade yg aku cam terkejut ..tak sangke aku tulis benda camtu..hahah..layan jelaa ~

Once upon a time.
When things are sweet and simple.
When people singing their love songs.
When the birds whistling their tune

Then as time goes by
Heart stops beating
Pulse stops pulsing
Love goes without saying

If that how times goes
Make my love stray away
Would it come back to me?
If I keep on wishing

Dear mr.clock pls stops ticking
Let me have this moment forever
Let me speak these 3 words first
Then you can start ticking again

Hey mr.clock why are you still ticking
I just want a moment.
I just want to say
I love you.

p/s: bengong~

oh my jimmy . . . choo! (with lil bits of spoiler)

ade 3 sbb nape org takan tgk cite nie:

1. sbb produksi malay

2. sbb cite stereotype

3. sbb diorg anti-fazura

ade 3 sbb nape aku nak tgk cite nie: (sblm aku g tgk)

1. sbb cite benard chauly

2. sbb ade fazura n aaron aziz (perfect combo for romance comedy..imo)

3. sbb nak tgk aaron aziz . . . hehe

3 benda menarik sepanjang cite:

1. redza minhat aka faqir aka mamat gigi besi yg cute

2. cameo appearance by rafidah 3r as a spa receptionist

3. cameo appearance by nas T and henry(cleo most eligible bachelor 2009) as gay couple

3 over used phrase:

1. demi masa depan anak2..

2. oh my louis vuitton ..oh my prada . . oh my dior . .the list go on..

3. panas~

6 sbb nape aku rase berbaloi tgk pisau cukur:

1. dpt teknik mencukur..

2. dpt tgk aaron aziz sebesar skrin..(drooling..:p)

3. sume aktor n aktres ade chemistry yg balance..esp dato rahim razali n his three wives..:P

4. cite mungkin ade skit stereotype tp script wise is much more refreshing n entertaining..

5. skrip dan lakon layar fits it rom-com genre..

6. dpt tgk mamat gigi besi yg sgt cute..

p/s: tgh dlm mode mencari penawar hati yg luka...

an appraisal of art

arts can be in so many form. in written. in visual. in shorties. in films. in speaking. etc. appraising arts can also be done in so many ways; by blogging it. by admiring, by standing ovation, by having mind debate, etc. recently, to be specific yesterday i got the opportunity to appraise a form of art; art of sculpture.

Rhythm of the 21st Century, Monologues of Raja Shahriman is currently exhibited at Galeri PETRONAS KLCC till Jan 2010. the sculptures were made of forged metal. From what i read in the phamplet, this is his 6th solo exhibition. besides sculpture, there were also sketches and paintings (catan). some of the sculptures were quite transparent (can be easily understood) while some of it were not. i think the overall idea of this is about wars. despite economy turmoil, global warming, wars is another significant tempo in rhythm of the 21st century.

though this was my 1st time at his solo exhibition, it was no doubt that YM Raja Shahriman is very talented artist when I was mesmerized and provoked as i saw this specific masterpiece. it was consisted of two big sculptures with gold bullets, standing opposite/align to each other on piles of stripes of forged metals, like ppl in warzone/maybe after the war. (i wish i could took the pix of that sculpture).impressive!

eventually, to be able to understand and appraise arts like this, it will be much easier if you join any walkthru with the Curator. As they can provide more info n details of the arts.

p/s: this is not my new interest. this is just something that i leisurely do.

angkatan jahanam . .

genre2 cite perang, sci-fi, dan yg seangkatan dgnnye bukan kegemaran aku. sbb kehidupan aku sendri pun dah cukup complicated..tk perlu aku peningkan kepala aku lg tgk cite camnie..tp haritu member aku ajak tgk cite "inglourious basterds"..aku pd awalnye mmg ragu2..tp aku cube bg peluang pade diri sendiri utk tgk movie nie..sumber kekuatan aku : quentin (had always been admiring his works)..

cite nie pasal zaman pemerintahan nazi hitler..around 1940s laa..dlm keghairahan org hitler nak menghapuskan kaum yahudi..ade satu kebangkitan yg cube melakukan yg sebaliknye iaitu dikenali "inglourious basterds"..kemuncak perjuangan mereka adalah apabila mereka mendapat tahu semua pemimpin tertinggi akan menghadiri premier tayangan filem di panggung wayang..perancangan pembunuhan beramai2 mule diatur..kegilaan disebalik pembikinan filem mengenai kejayaan seorang hitler membunuh hampir 300 org yahudi..dendam seorg pelarian yahudi setelah menyaksikan kematian ahli keluarganya..dan..tekad berani mati "angkatan jahanam" utk menghapuskan rejim pemerintahan fuhrer..sememangnye satu komedi gelap yg dpt digarap dgn baik..cume mungkin terlalu ganas kot..

utk lebih review >> Obefiend's Review

tukar lagi . .

aku cepat bosan laa skang..nape sampai mcm nie? maybe sbb aku tak jumpe lg benda yg aku betul2 nak..atau aku mmg dlm mode asik nak berubah je..aku tukar template lg..yg nie mmg tak se cooling n soothing sblm nie..maybe aku akan tukar lagi..minggu depan..tp i think for now..the new blog template is kinda cute too..aint it?

p/s: sumone call me yesterday..kalo b4 this i was so excited n berbunga2 bile die call..but this time around..his call buat aku migraine..currently tgh pk the correct words n phrase to tell him..to stop trying..as i am in no mood for love rite now..

Body odour, humdrum sex cause divorces in Terengganu
By R.S.N. MURALI
KUALA TERENGGANU: Smelly body odour, humdrum sex and boring pyjamas
are behind the high divorce rate in the state and the government is scrambling
to find ways to improve sexual relations, especially for newly wed couples.
Top on its list of proposals is to invite cosmetic firms to introduce exotic and sensuous fragrances which can arouse sexual ardour.
State Religious and Information committee deputy chairman Muhammad Ramli Nuh believes that this effort could slow the divorce rate among young couples.
He told The Star Sunday that at least three in every ten marriages registered in the state ended in divorce.
He added that separations were now common among couples aged between 25 and 30 years.Muhammad Ramli said that couples who had been married for less than five years but already on the verge of separation told counsellors that routine sex and smelly body odour were the main reasons behind their break up.
He said he was bewildered that some couples even blamed their spouses for old-fashioned pyjamas - sarong and t-shirt - body odour during intimate moments made their sex life monotonous or turned them completely off.
“I know of one case where a separation was triggered because the spouse smelled of fish crackers,” he said.
Hence, Muhammad Ramli ...

i maybe not in the right shoe to talk about this. but this is the fact. "kalo suke tu..bau kentut pun cam bau perfume vera wang/sjp/versace..tp kalo dah tak ske/bosan, bau yg dpt ditahan bertahun2 tu terus jadi cam bau busuk tahap bangkai". aku tak bape pasti punca2 benda mcm nie berlaku. mungkin sbb tak paham kot ape erti disebalik munakahat tu. atau menganggap perkahwinan tu skdr utk menghalalkan sesuatu yg haram tu..bukan memandangnye sbg suatu ibadah. menakutkan bile aku bace lingkungan umur tu. aku raselaa. pengertian perkahwinan tu sgt penting. kefahaman tu yg menentukan kejayaan sesuatu hubungan.

sambungan berite di The Star Online

p/s: haha..tk dpt bayangkan tido ngan org bau belacan..:P mintak dijauhkan laa..takpun aku suh mandi bunga je tiap hari..:P

aktiviti keluarga dan harapan keluarga

AktiViti Keluarga

adik laki aku td telah merajinkan diri die utk menolong mak kami buat kek marble. oh, tolong jgn terkejut. die bukan ske buat keja pompuan. tp die tolong sbb kek tu dibuat khas utk calon bini no 3 die. (no 1 n no 2 dah tak kisah dah pun) . jdnye. jadilah suatu senario yg tak penah aku lihat selama nie. adik aku yg pakai boxer je. sibuk mengayak tepung dan mengadun kek. sbb die pakai boxer je. so aku tak dptlaa amik gamba keriuhan dan kesepahan yg terjadi bile laki masuk dapur. kek tu turn out sedap. tp tak bape nak naik n gebu. mak aku saspek tepung kek tu tadek serbuk penaik. takpelaa.asalkan sedap. dan utk meraikan kerajinan adik aku, aku masakkan cucur udang dan cucur pisang (cekodok) utk diorg. sedapnye cicah cucur udang ngan kuah kacang!

Harapan keLuarga (sbnrnye harapan abah aku je)
haritu abah aku sibuk bertanye sape calon dihati. aku sbb tanak dgr sebarang idea pelik2, aku cakaplaa aku ade 2-3 org kawan. agaknya abah aku tak convince kot. die tanye lagi:

keja kat mane? org kat mane? bukan kelantan kan? bukan t'ganu kan? solat
penuh tak? dan byklaa soklan ceklist requirement yg lain..

aku dah dgr abah aku tanye byk benda nie. jd lainlaa.(nielaa sbbnye aku malas nak jumpe abah aku nie). pastu aku diam la. pastu abah aku kate nak kenalkan aku ngan sapetah. die kenal sbb mamat nie selalu g masjid. solat terawih tak tggl. n mcm2 kebaikan die abah aku canangkan. hurm. ok. sbb aku diam je, abah aku sambung lg. buat ape nak bercinta sgt sblm kawin? buat ape nak org hensem, kaya dan bla bla tp solat tunggang langgang. ok. aku dgr tang nie, aku mmg geram. tp aku start mengandaikan aku pakai kapas dlm telinga tak dgr pape. aku cume jawab:

nad tanak. nad nak cari sendri. biar lambat.at least kalo pape jd. nad sendri yg tanggung. tak payah nak involve sape2.

aku menghargai niat baik abah aku. tp aku dah berjanji dgn diri sendri hal hidup/cinta aku, biarlah aku sendri yg uruskan. wpun abah aku rase nie cara terbaik die nak menebus kesilapan die. aku ttp rase kesilapan abah aku tu. sudah lame aku maafkan. yg selebihnye. terserah pada Allah jela..

tak berbaloi

my (love)life had been bored..so bored..i decided to stop with the stupid idea of not talking to him after 5 days..as i realised that i can go on my life without him..i dont feel the excitement anymore..just consider he is another plain guy that not worthwhile for me to pursue/flirt/daydream anymore..he's exactly like other guys that i've known before..boring~

my days without rice were boring too..so today..i'll take a short break..my sis n family will be dropping by..mum n i had cooked sumthing special for them..ayam asam pedas n udang rempah..hungry~

temu bual di sri rampai

aku budget nak bangun kul 6.45 pg. .tp aku biarkan je alarm aku snooze. .seb baik tak terlajak byk..pastu siap bermamai dlm bilik air plak..sampai idea aku nak kuar umah 7.30 dh berganjak ke 7.50. .aku dah cuak sbnrnye. .tp aku redha je laa. .naik bas smp coliseum. .jln laju gile ke putra lrt. .smp kat stesen yg aku nak pegi..naik cab..alhamdulillah smpt smp 15 min awal b4 sesi aku start..isi borang..n then masuk bilik temu bual. .yeah..another round of interview session . .aku mmg akan sentiasa ade perasaan nervous . .everytime aku jumpe org baru or bile aku nak buat something yg bodoh. .so..pas 10 min, aku baru abis warm up. .the rest aku dah ok. .the firm seems fit me. .tp the pay so so. .memandangkan aku ade byk komitmen. .aku kena gaklaa stat keja asap..yg selebihnya. .semoga Allah permudahkan utk aku . .amin

luck luck . .come to me

have a job interview tmr morning..as it had been a month i'm at home..i started to feel bored and bored..bored bcoz there aint good show to watch on tv during the day (we didnt subscribe astro)..bored bcoz there isnt enuff money to splurge anymore..i'm really need retail theraphy here..(why do i need it at the first place? i got nothing to be stressed about) . . shopping is sooo part of me . . .so let pray hard . .that i'll get the job tomorrow. .if not? then . . i keep on searching . . unlike bf, searching for job much easier . . if you like the job. .but the job didnt . .we will straight away get the answer within their stipulated time . .no waiting for the phone calls . . waiting for the mail . .jobs specify the criteria that they're looking for . .so you know straight away whether you'll be in or not. .bf . .would never be specific. .a minute they looking for hot chic . .the next minute they're looking for money . .and jobs would pay all ur expenses, satisfy ur needs, makes u happy..bf? keep on dreaming . . all right ..all right ..this is soo out of topic . .signing off now . .

p/s: the symptoms of gossip gal side effects becoming more apparent . .need a cure. .

not bad . . not bad . .

it's been 3 days without any communication with him. . i showed no withdrawal symptoms. .well. .it seems like i might able to nail this mission . . :)

on the other side . . 2days without rice was tooo much for me. . dunno how long will i be able to refrain myself from rice . .

aja2 fighting!

masakan berinspirasikan bayam

minggu lepas, aku telah merajinkan diri pegi pasar malam jumaat kat belakang umah aku.sbbnye, ari dah nak ujan dan mak aku ade meeting dan aku malas nak masak. tp spt biasa, aku skip beli ikan2. aku terus beli sayur mayur (wujud ke kata berganda nie) byk sayur aku borong (utk mengimbangkan balik rutin mknn aku slps aktiviti makan luar biasa kat penang) antaranya kangkung, kubis, tomato dan bayam. sejujurnye, aku tak ske beli bayam. sbbnye? aku tak ske nak menyelinap daun dr btg bayam setiap kali nak masak.sgt leceh dan amik masa. tp sbb aku tgk sayur tu segar drpd biasa, aku pun amik laa. dan semalam mase aku nak masak, aku tgk bayam nie masih lawa lg. yummy! puas aku pk nak masak ape. akhirnye aku decide nak buat salad se n spageti sos. idea nie aku dpt dr tgk cooking show n women's weekly. aku kan ske buat resepi sendri. (gamba agak blur skit)


Spinach carbonara spaghetti

Sauce:
1 can Prego Carbonara
Onion and chopped garlic
Butter
1 cup of fresh milk
Ayamas black pepper frankfurter
Freshly grounded black pepper
Seasoning - salt/chicken stock

(ingredients below are to be blended together)
Blanched spinach Water
Chili padi

Methods:
1. Heat n melt the butter, add in onions n garlics.
2. Pour in the prego sauce, follow by milk. Bring up to boil
3. Add in the spinach sauce and frankfurter, black pepper and seasoning
4. When the sauce is in thick consistency, add in the spaghetti (which had been cooked earlier).Mix well.
5. Served with generous sprinkle of parmesan cheese.

Spinach & Egg salads

Spinach (blanched in boiling water with pinch of salt for 1-2 minutes)
2 hard boiled eggs
Boiled potatoes
Cooked Prawns
Tomatoes (thinly slice)
Salt and pepper
Parmesan cheese

Mix all the salad ingredients while it is still hot. flavor with salt and pepper and parmesan cheese. Yummy.




p/s: i love it! hopefully you too..